Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Love Dare Day 6

Day 6: Love is not irritable.
Choose today to react to tough circumstances in your marriage in loving ways instead of with irritation. Begin by making a list below of areas where you need to add margin to your schedule. Then list any wrong motivations that you need to release from your life.

I've taken "making a list below of areas where you need to add margin to your schedule" to mean that I need to look at what I can do in my life to make more time for me and my family. 

1. I need to be more serious about Flying so I will have more time for me and for my family. (stress)
2. I need to get Family Rules completely set up so there can be more peace in our home.(stress)
3. I need to wake at a reasonable time on a more regular basis so I will have more time to do the needed things in my home and have time to play. And most importantly to make my husband happy. (selfishness)
4. I need to make time each day to be with my husband.  To just be us. (selfishness)

As far as wrong motivations...
Bitterness and perfectionism are my big ones.  Actually most of the time my perfectionism leads to my bitterness.  I hate that I am this way.  And I want to change.  So, what do you do to change this?  FlyLady.  She will help me let go of my perfectionism and therefore much of my bitterness.  A bit at a time.  Just like the love dare.  So really- My list of four things will help me all around.  The first two will help to bring the stress level in the house down.  The last two will help me show my husband that I know it's not all about me. 

As far as the first part of todays dare- yes I completed it.  There was a big blow-up with my husband and son over celery.  Particularly the ants on a log variety.  I won't get into the nitty gritty of it all as I feel it was a ridiculous thing for either of them to get upset about.  But I will tell you the end result.

My husband asked if the love dare could be used on other family members besides your spouse.  I kid you not.  And the creepy thing is- I had been talking to my bff about that posibility earlier today.  Scary.  While you obviously can't follow it to a T with anyone other than your spouse I'm sure you could change just a few of the dares to fit with a child, a parent, a sibling, etc.

So I told him as much and then suggested the possibility of me going through the book to find and change the dares that need to be changed to reflect a parent-child relationship.

What could have resulted in the whole house screaming became a point where we may have found a solution.  What do you all think of changing the love dare to work on other relationships?
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